Beyond Disconnection

In this episode of Shades of Intimacy, Jenny shares her Origin Story with the listeners.  Being content in her disconnection for so long, wasn’t an issue for Jennie until Jason and his 3 children entered her life. It caused her to take notice of the sedation and a pattern of disconnect she was trapped in that kept her from fully opening up to her new family and herself.


Topic #1

Bridesmaids and Loyalty

  • Jennie opens this special episode by recalling a time at a friends house when she was a child. Her friend asked her to be her bridesmaid when she got older and met her dream man. Jennie couldn’t connect the dots, she didn’t understand what her friend was saying.
  • Jennie was the only girl and youngest of 5 children. She admired and feared her father and her mother was beautiful and hurting. She remembers her mother removing herself often, to go behind a locked door and suffer alone, where they couldn’t see. The family was loyal and disconnected from each other
  • As Jennie grew up her friends were always looking forward to being in a relationship. Again she couldn’t connect the dots, couldn’t fathom what they were talking about or why they would want that. Jennie loved sports and that was about loyalty and again not about connection.

“My mother was beautiful and hurting. She spent a lot of time behind a locked door, suffering alone, in seclusion. ”

Topic #2   

The Thaw

  • As an adult, Jennie took a job in a lab. It was very clinical, and not about connection. Every night she would go home and feed her animals, sit on her couch and watch T.V. and was content in that. Financially stable and independent, but numb and disconnected.
  • Then she met Jason and that changed everything. He thawed that numbness, she had other relationships, but never any connection. Jason opened her feminine and gave her a closeness. He also had 3 children, which she had never had.
  • As time went on, Jennie failed to connect, and the numbness returned. She was disconnected and removing herself from Jason that the children. It crushed her because there were 4 amazing people on the other side of the door that wanted nothing more from her but that connection. She stepped back into sedation.
  • Those children didn’t deserve it; they had already lost their mother tragically, it wasn’t fair. Jason came to her and said, no more. She knew she was loyal but she was not connected. He drew a line in the sand and said either fight or get the fuck out. And they have fought every day, because that what’s important; connection. The family started getting raw and real and communicating and being honest with each other.

“Those children deserve it; they had already lost their mother tragically, it wasn’t fair.”

Closing Thoughts

  • Getting rid of all the white noise and the bullshit and focusing on what’s important, was their connection and their relationship. They were committed to each other and they are committed to this podcast. Committed in sharing everything they have been through and leaving a breadcrumb trail to the path to help you, the listener, get out of your own disconnection. They hope you join them on this journey, that promises to be a wild ride.



Scroll to top